The Grind

Those of you who did NOT watch MTV in the 90's may think that you're about to read a Sunday night lament of the impending workday.

You are sorely mistaken.

Those of you who did watch MTV in the 90's know that you are in for a real treat.

Who remembers Eric Nies? What kind of question is that?! Who doesn't remember Eric Nies? One of the first reality TV stars (The Real World) turned dance/workout god on The Grind.

And guess who stumbled across one of his videos?!

ME ME ME ME ME ME ME !!!!!

And guess who is ridiculous enough to actually attempt said workout video?

ME ME ME ME ME ME ME !!!!!

The amount of unflattering Addidas spandex and unnecessary bandanna wearing should have/would have been enough to deter someone more stable than myself. At first I thought I might watch part of it over cookie dough ice cream tomorrow, basking in nostalgia.

I couldn't wait that long. And Eric's abs inspired me to fore go the ice cream.

While The Grind workout once featured "the freshest hip hop dance steps" allowing you to "grind to the best of a sizzling MTV soundtrack" . . . somehow I'm afraid these moves might not play quite as well in 2010. Here's a quick peek at the Grind moves (you may only need to watch the first half of the video to get the idea):



Now as you may have guessed. . . that is not Eric Nies. But those ARE the moves. That is also the ONLY video online of this workout! You'd think MTV would've done a little more careful marketing. Anyway. This guy makes it look a lot easier than it actually is - I assure you. In fact, he may look better doing it than I do. Of all the times I wished my living room blinds actually provided some privacy . . . Well, there goes that last little annoying shred of dignity. But for Eric Nies it was worth it.

This is Eric Nies:


So is this (and this bit is PG-13):



And so you see what I'm saying.

Now if we could just track down a delorian or a magical, George Carlin carrying phone booth to transport me back to a time and place where my fresh new, kick butt hip hop moves will be appreciated. . .

Stay tuned. . . I only watched the first half of the tape. When Eric started the ab workout with a series of pelvic tilts, I had to call it a night. I'll let you know when I work up the nerve to give the second half of the tape a try. (and here I'll refer you back to that second photo).